The past few days was a big reminder to stop sweating all the small stuff and look at the bigger picture.
I ALMOST didn’t want to share anything at all with you guys, but I really want to keep you guys updated on life happenings. And I could really use your understanding and support at this time.
I never considered myself one of those very PARTICULAR type of people. But I have quickly realized over the past couple of days that I am VERY VERY PARTICULAR about EVERYTHING! Everything in the house. I want things a certain way and I don’t like when things are different lol.
I keep reminding myself “I love my family, I love my family, I love my family. . .”but life events are testing every bit of patience and love I have at this time.
Remember a few months ago with I caught the flu? Well that is where our life update begins!
My hubby and I recovered after a few weeks and were pretty much back to normal pretty quickly even though we got an infection on top of it.
Unfortunately, my mom’s recovery was much worse.
She ended up with a lung infection and all sorts of infections -basically body-wide infection. During all the testing, they came across some kidney stones on one side that had to be addressed. Through further testing (all the while taking antibiotics and getting rid of the infection) they determined that her kidney stones are called Staghorn kidney stones.
They are the kind of kidney stones that grown inside all the kidney tubules and ultimately can stop kidney function. Well her’s are very large which means this has been going on for quite some time & it has rendered her kidney completely non-functional. Due to all the infections, it started enlarging so TOMORROW, the kidney is coming out!!
This is pretty bad and the recovery is going to be pretty long, BUT the good news is that her other kidney is perfectly healthy!! We are all just so grateful that (at least after her recovery), she is going to be super healthy, just minus her bum kidney that isn’t working.
I am very scared for her because she is so young and she has been SO HEALTHY for someone in her mid 50’s!! She takes ZERO medications besides the occasional allergy pill.
Well here’s where the sweating the small stuff has come into play. I think because I am so worried about her that I am freaking out about so many more things than I may normally freak out about. I try to analyze myself all the time (I was a psych major lol).
It wasn’t good enough that my hubby and I are already living here and offered to help (and mind you, I work AT HOME and already got nearly everything prepped ahead of time so that I can take time and take care of her). Oh no. . . she invited my grandparents to come stay with us too.
We are taking 5 adults living in a 3 bedroom house that is already overcrowded because my mom and I BOTH work at home (believe me, my mom and I being together all day, every day is a whole story all on it’s own!!).
Up until now, I basically handle the household. I cook, I clean, I tend to our dogs, I mostly do the grocery shopping, pretty much run the house because my mom is nice enough to let us move back in during my hubby’s grad school adventures.
Well my mom invited my grandmother to come help take care of her. . . instead of me. She’s basically told my grandmother that she can be in charge of cooking (one of my FAVE things), and my grandmother is just so happy that she can help out at all so I can’t take that away from her. My grandfather is just along for the ride & to visit. He can’t really help out so much because he recently had a hip replacement so he doesn’t get around very well.
So I am kind of hurt that I am not the one who she decided to have take care of her. I was the very obvious choice (proximity, relationship, um, DAUGHTER). That’s a whole different story too. . . I digress. . .
They arrived on Saturday evening, It is now Monday evening. It’s been a very trying couple of days. It’s not that they are rude or messy or mean or anything.
I am just basically flipping out because things aren’t JUST how I want them. It is not them, it’s ME! Ok, it’s a little bit them. But it is mostly me.
There’s issues with one of them being a smoker (outside only but still enough to set off one of my migraines).
There are issues with me sharing a bathroom with them since we don’t have the master bedroom (2 bathroom house), basically 4 adults sharing one bathroom during the day.
There are issues about other people touching my food (I don’t fully enjoy eating out because I don’t like the idea of people touching my food so much!!).
And I even dislike the dogs going out every 30-45 minutes. (The dog stands up, “Oh, they need to go outside” the second the word outside is mentioned all 4 of the dogs go nuts “ok I am going to take them out”, again. and again. AND AGAIN.).
Ok so I realize that all of this makes me sound a little insane, but I am sure you can relate to having your space invaded by well-meaning family members!
Bottom line is this:
I love my mom.
I love my grandparents.
They all drive me absolutely crazy.
I am so happy that my mom is going to be OK.
I’m incredibly thankful that they are all here and able to drive me completely crazy.
So now you know one of my deep dark secrets that I didn’t even want to admit to myself. I want EVERYTHING (not just my business stuff) just done MY WAY. I guess that goes with being an only child & being spoiled. I’m particular. I’m (I dare say) perfectionistic about a lot of things in my life. I need to LET GO. I’m a work in progress.
Thanks for letting me share that with you. My mom’s scheduled for surgery first thing in the morning to remove her kidney & I will post an update on Facebook as soon as I know anything. Please keep her in your thoughts/prayers, send out good surgery vibes, whatever works for you. She sure would appreciate it.